Skip to main content

I am that Therapist friend who people turn to when they are in pain. I have always had some kind of power over people where I somehow manage to convince them that this is not the end of the world, there’s more to it, and the more to it is beautiful. 


Hang in there, I’ll hang in with you, we’ll get through this together. I would preach about looking at the bright side, being optimistic, looking for the silver lining, and what not! 


So when tables turned, it just hit me hard that it’s way easier said than done. 


My friends who were once my projects were now putting in their best effort to help me look at the silver lining by making me a list of all the rational logic. They did what exactly I would do, they were there, they were ALWAYS there trying numerous ways to cheer me up. 


I went to places I loved, I did things that used to give me confidence, I ate all the fries and froyos. I was trying, just not hard enough. I wasn’t able to get through my pain, I felt trapped all the time. I didn’t feel independent anymore. The independence I valued over everything. 


It took me time to get here but I’ve finally had it with feeling suffocated. My love for freedom finally outweighed my pain and I decided to fix myself. I went down the road of self-healing and it wasn’t easy at first, but it definitely made me realize that NO ONE CAN FIX YOU UNLESS YOU WANT TO FIX YOURSELF.

 

I am still healing but I am also still the Therapist Friend, however now rather than being on the side, I prefer to walk behind my friends so that it’s easy for me to push them down the road to self-healing :)


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

PATTERNs & MOs

  I have a friend who once told me about this theory of how we keep befriending or falling for people with identical qualities. It's like a pattern, a subconsciously identified comfort zone that we get lured by.  I gave quite a thought to this, much more than I usually do to something I generally hear. I got really lucky in the friendship department, so falling in the pattern is worth my while. I would happily do it over and over again.  But, when it comes to matters of heart, mmm, not so much! I just realised that the MO of the guys I get involved with is terrifying. (Switched to MO instead of patterns because it's criminal the number of times I have been hurt). It starts with them finding me somewhere on the internet. For the first month, they treat me like I put stars in the sky, pursue me as their world revolves around me, and practically force me to fantasise about a full-fledged life with them. Well, I am no less. My MO is over-sharing, a butt load of honesty, putting on
Post a Comment
Read more

Jack of Crisis, Masters of Denial

  Sinking in the sea of crisis, human-made, situational or self-induced. We aren't looking for solutions anymore. We aren't wasting time sulking. We are straight-up pushing it all to the deepest, darkest, rarely visited corners of our heads. After all, living in denial still counts for living, contrary to facing the feelings that leave you lifeless. We are eating, drinking, sleeping off or sleeping with the crisis. Pretending to be as unbothered while denying the fact that it burns like a gin and hurts like a bitch. Faking, hoping to make it. Skating through life while the fire within simmers only to erupt when least expected.
Post a Comment
Read more

Ah! The incomparable joy and comfort in the lonliness

  The joy of roaming around in an empty house in a robe with a glass of wine, The comfort of eating your favourite meal in a public space with your AirPods on, The joy of watching a movie and not getting prompted every minute,  The comfort of not having to talk to anyone after a long-long day of work, The subtle joy and comfort in knowing there isn't anyone for you to depend upon. If you shatter into a thousand pieces, no one is going to pick any fraction of it. I am now best friends with the void that scared the shit out of me. Chills run through my body when I spare a mere thought of how comfortable I have gotten in my own company. I don't know what or which particular experience it is that cut right through me. But whatever or whoever did it, they did me a favour. After it all, you are all you got.
Post a Comment
Read more